It’s really easy to talk about what we want in someone. I want a woman that’s fine and smart and sexy and giving, etc. I want a woman that’s caring and beautiful and fashionable. What we forget though, what matters more than what we want is who we are and what we attract.
That leads me to the point of this article. Instead of constantly talking about what you want; talk about what you want to be. We attract what we are, it’s that simple. It’s easy to say we have bad luck or attract the wrong people but that’s not the case. We give people the time of day because there’s something in them that we see in ourselves.
When I think about the type of husband I want to be I don’t think about what my future wife would want or be attracted to. I think about what type of woman would be attracted to the man I’m becoming; the man I am. Part of being a good husband or boyfriend is becoming a good man first. Not how I look with my shirt off or my ambitions as a provider but having the type of soul, standards, morals and heart that will stand adversity. Six packs become kegs, wavy hair becomes a receding hairline. A great job becomes Exxon Mobil laying off a 1000 people on a Tuesday. Commitment has to be deeper than that. Commitment has to lie at the heart of the man you are.
This isn’t the point where I rattle off a list of traits and characteristics where women ohh and ahh. This isn’t the point where I take shots at other men they still have a lot of growing to do in their relationship. This is the point where I say, “Just because you fall short today doesn’t mean you can’t stand tall tomorrow. Just because you aren’t the man or woman you’d want your son or daughter to marry tonight; that doesn’t mean you can’t be that man or woman two months from now.” The reason couples seem so perfect today and they’re divorced tomorrow is because they dated, fell in love with and married representatives. You can’t bare your soul to a representative. Look inside yourself and there you will find the reflection of who it is you want in your heart.