My Only Sin Was Loving You Too Much

IMG_0629Sleep felt foreign at the moment, laying down, closing his eyes, it just wouldn’t come. Getting out of bed as not to disturb her he walked out the bedroom and lied on the couch. Not knowing how long his eyes had been closed he could hear her in the kitchen, opening the fridge, closing the fridge. Running water in the sink, letting water out of the sink. His temper and stress had her walking on egg shells and her trust issues and the intensity of her love had him not knowing how to approach her at times. Not knowing how to explain to her that her doubts and fears were unwarranted.

His phone sitting on the kitchen table, he made no effort to go get it. If she was going to look through it, she was going to look through it. It’s the nature of women he thought to himself, curiosity killed the cat.

When she walked in the living room and put the TV on mute he knew tonight wouldn’t just be another sleepless night but another night without peace. He knew what the look meant before any words came out of her mouth. The look of fear mixed with anger, passion mixed with uncertainty.

“I know you want me to forget about it, to get over it but I still have questions. Why is it okay for you to just dismiss what’s important to me? What did the message say? Are you going on dates? Are there other women? I saw you looking up restaurants online, you took off work. Is there someone else Ron?”

The more she talked, the more he tried to put himself in her shoes but the more he tried to understand her, the more he just couldn’t. Though he loved women, though he never made it a secret about his past relationships he’d changed for her. Gone were the late night text and phone calls. Gone were the happy hours and friends that couldn’t except he wasn’t the man he used to be. Every one around him saw it, so why couldn’t she see it?

Why were tears of pain falling from her eyes at 3:00am instead of tears of pleasure? He wanted to hold her, hug her, kiss her and tell her it was going to be alright but his pride ran deep. His love for her was unquestionable so why couldn’t her faith in him be unwavering?

Before he knew it the glass in his hand shattered against the living room door!

“Why don’t you ever just shut up?! You have to pick a fight every night because of your got damn insecurities?!”

Turning his back and walking towards the kitchen he could hear her footsteps behind him. Standing in a pair of panties and holding her wine glass she pushed him in the back and as soon as he turned around he felt the wine hit his face!

“You don’t talk to me like that! I’m not afraid of you and you will not disrespect me!” His hand was around her neck before she finished her sentence. Letting her go, she gasped for air as he backed up.

Wiping the wine out his eyes with his shirt he wasn’t fast enough as the glass she was holding connected with his mouth. The taste of blood on his tongue and the immediate swelling on the tips of his fingers. Their fights had always been bad but the pint up hostility, aggression, resentment. It boiled over to a place it had never been to before. The aggression a substitute for desire. Rage a substitute for words that needed to be spoken.

Seeing his mouth bleeding she could muster no compassion, not for the man that had taken everything from her that made her, her. Her love for him was in direct conflict with the independence and control she had in her own life. The deeper he penetrated her heart, the more she felt helpless in just how much control he had over her mind, body and soul.

As they kissed he bit her lip and looking into his eyes she licked the blood off his mouth. As their tongues intertwined she ripped open his shirt and he pinned her against the wall. Hunger being replaced by hate; the intensity of him needing to be inside of her being replaced by the urge to grab his keys and never see her again.
Her legs wrapped around his waist, her hands in his hair, her eyes glazed over.

“I love you sooo much. I need you sooo much! If you’re going to leave me, do it now because I won’t be okay if you drag this out knowing it’s not what you want.”

He didn’t know why he was crying. Part of him wanted to believe it was because she felt like Heaven in his arms but a part of him knew it was because the intensity of their love scared him just as much as it scared her.

Love this deeply rarely works because the fire tends to consume everyone.

Heaven and Hell In A Touch

Touching you is like Heaven to a God.

Touching you makes life feel worth living.

Touching you gives me a feeling that I haven’t felt since I wrote my first story.

I have nightmares about the goosebumps on your thighs. About the moistness between your thighs, my nightmares are that I’ll never see them again.

Or that I’ll never kiss or touch them again. I wake up looking around afraid that our best nights were our last nights.

I wake up scared to death that you’re with another man. That he has your nipple in his mouth or your finger tracing his chest as you lie in bed and talk.

I can’t sleep because the feeling of your naked body on my body is the only thing that gives me rest.

Touching you gives me a comfort that calms me.

Touching you gives me life that I never expected to have.

I hate the fact that I met you because I fear that I’ll never meet another like you.

I hate the fact that you know what you do to me and could care less because you’ve probably did it to a thousand men.

I hate the fact that your smile can change my mind set in .00001 seconds.

Touching you is what God wanted when he invented our hands.

Touching you is what Satan wants when he wants me to sin.

Touching you is my Heaven and my Hell…

I need you but I know you’re the worst thing that could have ever happened to me because you represent hope and love and desire. Why do I need all those things if all you’re going to do is walk away from me.

Your touch changed my life.

Your touch made me hate life.

I’ll bounce back from your touch but just know you’ll never meet a man that would have loved you more than I loved you.

For I not only love with my heart and soul but I love with my fingertips and the tip of my tongue and the tips of my soul.

~ Demez F. White


Stress Relievers

20140627-230359.jpg Leaving the meeting he knew it was his fault. Everyone in the room knew it was his fault though none of them were willing to say it. It was his 3rd big screwup in as many months and it wasn’t like him at all.

Loosening his tie, closing his office door all he could think was, “Why is this happening?” The mistake had been made and sitting in an empty office on a Friday wasn’t going to fix it.

Scrolling though his phone only one number stood out, “I can’t focus, I’m fucking up. You want to get a drink?” The text read.

“I want you to come fuck me,” she responded.

Between work and work he hadn’t seen her in a month, as soon as he read to text he could feel himself getting hard. Adjusting his dick, looking at the stack of contracts on his desk; he just walked out the office.

“This shit can wait until Monday.” He said to no one in particular.

Normally there would be some playful back and forth. He’d ask her if he needed to bring anything, if she was hungry. Not today though. “I want you to come fuck me.” Seeing those words over and over on his screen did something to him. Running red lights he justified as yellow, rolling through stop signs, weaving through cars in traffic he needed to relieve the stress that had him drinking and not sleeping.

Every 5 minutes or so he would get a picture. The first was just a bra and panties on the bed, “Should I put them on or nah?” The second was her in a short robe, clear she’d just gotten out the shower by the way it was sticking to her. It was open but just enough. Her hands on where her panties should have been. “If you don’t hurry and get here I’m starting without you!” The 3rd picture almost made him hit two cars. Her robe was on one side of the bed, her lingerie was on the other. A vibrator lying beside her. On all fours, completely naked, her legs spread. “Thank God for timers on camera phones. I swear I’ve never been this wet.” He put the phone face down and images flashed before his eyes like lightening.

10 minutes later he was pulling into her driveway. Ready to bang on the door he thought about it and it was unlocked. Walking inside, music playing, candles burning. Her in the kitchen in the same robe, in the same heels. Not saying a word, just kissing her hard, sucking on her bottom lip, cupping her breast. Her trying her best to unbuckle his pants with his hands making the come here motion inside of her.

Biting her shoulder, licking her neck, the robe hanging from the ceiling fan, her bent over! That first moment he slides in, the tightness and wetness gripping him. One hand on the back of her neck, the other hand alternating between slapping her ass and the finger in her ass.

No taking it slow, no warming up or finding a rhythm. Just him trying to relieve the stress and her all so willing to be that stress reliever.

Demez F. White



Rainy days aren’t meant to be spent alone, it’s something about the thunder, the lightening, the rain beating against the roof that caused the inside of my thighs to convulse. Maybe it was the Brazilian that was a couple days old or the fact that I was running late and forgot to put on panties. Either way my hormones were fucking with my train of thought and before I knew it my phone was in my hand. Music had a way of bringing up old memories and the radio station wasn’t doing me any favors with this old school mix they were playing.

There’s a meeting in my bedroom was pumping through my speakers and I’ll be damned if that wasn’t the last song we made love to. Wait… Wait… Who am I kidding, it was the last song we fucked to. A dark alley, my shirt and bra on, all his clothes on… The front seat of his truck, that wasn’t making love, that was what it was.

The body wants what it wants right?


It was barely five and I was past drunk. I used to love rain and now all this bullshit did was remind me of her. A hot shower, some good music and my bottle was all I had to keep me company. No matter how many women I called or tried to hook up with, they just weren’t keeping my fucking interest! My phone stayed close to me, in my hand, the pocket of my pajama pants, on my counter or desk. I was just waiting for the perfect text or call to come through.

Seeing her name on my screen wasn’t what I was expecting and now I was right in the middle of her fucking with me.

I don’t care… Do what you want!

You don’t care huh, call me and tell me that.

I don’t have to prove anything to you.

If you don’t care, call and tell me you don’t care!

I knew I wasn’t strong enough to walk away from her, I was tired of the bullshit, the drama. Her provoking me! But what was I supposed to do, these other women were not doing the job but if I called her I knew where it would lead.

The drink was cold in my hand, the liquor had me in my feelings, the rain had me ready to make a baby and she had me ready to fuck someone up! I let up the window to get some fresh air in, I loved the sound of rain, the mist hitting me in the face.

I need to get this bitch out of my head… One call, just to let her know the shit she was doing didn’t bother me. The texts, the calls, the pictures, I needed to let her know they weren’t getting to me. I had to let her know they weren’t getting to me!


I knew he would call, he could talk all the shit he wanted, those other ho’s weren’t me which meant he was probably sitting at home stressing. I knew him better than he knew himself.

“Hey baby!” He hated when I was sounding all extra happy and he wasn’t. “So you’re happy for me huh?”

“That’s what I said, I’m happy for you.” If there was one man that wore his emotions on his sleeves, it was this man. It was all in his voice.

“Don’t lie to me, not on a Wednesday! I can hear it in your voice… You’re not happy for me.”

He didn’t say anything for a minute, pride was a bitch.

“I’m happy for you Nicolette, I hope he’s treating you right.” If he wanted to play this game I would play it with him.

“He is treating me right, like umm umm good right! I mean, we’re friends right, so you don’t mind me talking about this?”

5, 4, 3, 2, 1… I knew it was coming before he did.


I couldn’t help but smile, men would always be men.

“If you don’t want to hear that shit! You need to come make me stop talking about him!” His pride was fucking with him, he didn’t want to be number two, the guy I called when my man wasn’t around but he missed me. He missed the sex, the comfort, the words.

“I’m not that guy, I’m not a fucking sideline ho!”

I was horny; I needed his tongue and his passion tonight. It was a long day.

“You want me, you know you want me! I’m down the street from my place, if you’re not here by eight I’ll take that as you didn’t want to be here.”

I hung up, pulled into my complex and thought about what I was going to wear tonight. He was coming and I was going to cum!


What the hell was I doing, I was too drunk to be driving in the first place and besides that I was starting to hate this girl. So why the hell was I hitting the freeway trying to get to her? Puling up to her gate, I wasn’t confused, I knew I wanted to be here but what I didn’t get was why the hold was so strong?

I downed a bottle of water, trying to sober myself up, at least a little bit. But I don’t think it was working.

She had a crazy baby daddy, a man that was paying his weight in gold for her and God knows what else going on. I took my gun and put it behind my back, drunk or not I wasn’t crazy. I took the stairs asking myself why I was weak behind her.

When she opened the door I had the answer to my question…

A pair of pink boy shorts, light green trim, no top, no shoes, her hair on her shoulders. I knew what I was here for and I didn’t regret it! If I was going to do this, I was going to do it! I picked her up and she wrapped her legs around my waist, her scent, her lips, the feel of her in my arms, everything seemed so familiar, so perfect!

Maybe I was just a thing for her, just a release and I knew I would pay for this, I knew it would fuck my head up but I needed this. I wanted this.

Her lips on my lips, the heat from her pussy on my stomach, there was no where else I wanted to be. “So you didn’t miss me huh? You didn’t miss me?! Tell that shit to your other bitches!” I pushed her on the floor, her legs wrapped around me, my mouth on her neck!

“I don’t care what you do! I just want the pussy! That’s all I came for!” She flipped me over, took control and got on top of me! But my chin and my chest.

“Tell that shit to someone else! You want me, you know I’m all you think about.” She stood up and took off the boy shorts, stuffed them in my pocket.

“You wont’ taste this again, so take those home with you and smell them when you get hard! Your other bitch doesn’t smell like that!”

She stood directly over me and just looked down, touching herself, balancing herself on her toes. “Tell me you want to taste it! Say it or I promise I’ll kick you out of here right now!” She was trying to punk me, to make herself the aggressor. I needed to tell her to go to hell, that I didn’t give a fuck. But how was I supposed to do that with her cat staring at me. Pretty, pink, bare…

“I want to taste it.”

I could feel the heat coming down on my mouth before I could taste it, three months felt like three decades. Between my mouth watering and her wetness the sound was like bath water running. I could feel myself drowning but I didn’t want her to get up.

“Eat it baby! Eat it! Show me you love me!”

Did I love her? Did I? Or was I in love with what she did to me? She was a high, an addiction. I swallowed her, licked her, sucked her, I wanted her to know how much I missed her. How in control of this pussy I was!

I picked her up and threw her on her back, her legs on my shoulders. Naked, sweating, her chest pumping up and down. I knew I should have put on a condom but I couldn’t help myself, the warmth, the tightness, the moistness. It was worth it, she was always worth it.

She liked it rough, hard, she loved talking dirty. I bit down on her neck, I wanted him to see a hickie, a mark! If there was a him he would know I was here!


In my mind we were making love, in my heart we were cherishing this moment. In reality… She was getting a nut and I was falling deeper in a situation I shouldn’t be in.

No Crying Over the Mistress

Showers are a gift from the Gods! The steam, body scrubs, shampooing, the way the water hits my back and my face. When I was growing up, we didn’t have a shower in the house, only a bathtub and for eighteen years I took a bath every night. I honestly can’t remember the last time I took a bath now. I shower like two, three times a day… Just for the experience, just for the relaxation it brings.

I stepped out the shower and grabbed a towel wrapping it around my waist. The bathroom was spotless, it was always spotless, my wife just didn’t play when it came to a clean home. Hell, after only two years of marriage I was trained to pick up every towel, wash every dish and to use a coaster. I took my left hand and wiped the steam off the window. My wedding band catching my eye, I never took it off, never.

Letting the water in the sink get hot, I washed my face with some Apricot Scrub, brushed my teeth. Trimmed any loose hairs around my goatee and just stared at myself. I was a man that had it all, the American Dream and I also lived every single day with the fear that my wife would find out I had a side ho. I guess I could call her a mistress or “the other woman” but the truth was, I was spending money out of our household to take care of this woman. I wasn’t falling in love with her, it was just sex. Really good, really nasty sex. Something my wife just didn’t have time for; don’t get me wrong, when we had it, it was amazing! But it happens to far and between for my liking.

Just thinking about her, how excited she gets when I send her a text and tell her I found some time for her or when I bring her some flowers or actually take her somewhere. There’s nothing like that “grateful sex” you get from a woman that’s just not used to getting a lot. It’s like tonight, she wants to go see a movie so I told her to find a nice out of the way theater and restaurant and I’ll make the time. All day, she’s been texting me about what she’s going to wear and what we’re going to see. I don’t even think my wife would sit thru a two hour movie, let alone get excited about it.

I kept my towel wrapped, dried my feet off on the rug and walked across the cold hard wood floors to the closet. A pair of grey slacks, a white button down shirt and a burgundy v-neck sweater from would be my attire for the night. Black belt, black loafers, Skagen watch with the blue face and black leather band and Kenneth Cole Black Cologne. I was a little bit of a perfectionist when it came to me appearance.

Black boxers, burgundy socks and black tank top underneath and in ten minutes my outfit was on and I was ready to go.

Stepping out the closet, walking over to the dresser to get my wallet, keys and money clip I could feel her standing in the door.

“You look nice, where are you getting ready to go?”

The thing about lying to your wife is simple; you can’t actually tell a lie. Because no matter how much she trusts you, she’ll check up on you sooner or later and she’ll remember where you said you were going two months from now. So, I always had a real live event, party, social function scheduled for whenever I was going to go see my side ho. And the reason is, if my wife asks questions or if she decides she wants to go, I’ll have a real place to take her. An alibi that doesn’t depend on a friend that might want to sleep with her or something else.

“Benjamin is having a little get together tonight for his birthday, I know we don’t talk like we used to but he’s a pretty cool guy. I thought I would go over there and have a couple of drinks, give my well wishes.” She walked over to where I was standing in front of the dresser, “Hold this.” She handed me her wine glass.

“You smell good; I didn’t know if that sweater would fit you, you’ve lost a little weight lately. Let me fix your collar.”

Her fingers grazed my neck while she was straightening my collar, she was a beautiful woman, there was no doubt about that. A pair of pink boy shorts, a white tank top, no bra. Her body screamed fuck me, but she just didn’t like to fuck. It was weird, but I married her knowing that.

“I think I want to go, where is it.” I couldn’t show her that I wanted with all my heart for her to stay her ass at home.

“It’s at Hotel ZaZa.”

“I love their Martinis! I want to go.” I grabbed her around the waist and pulled her into my body.

“Baby, I want you to go, but you know it’s going to take you a minute to be ready and I don’t want to be too late.” She looked up at me and gave me a peck on the lips.

“Boy! It takes you way longer than it takes me, I got my hair fixed earlier and I just got out the shower so let me throw on a little makeup, I have the perfect dress and shoes and I’ll be like thirty minutes. Go downstairs, fix yourself a drink, listen to some music and I’ll be down shortly.” She kissed me again, this time with her full lips and tongue.

“Al, I know it’s been awhile and I know how much sex means to you. So, I’m going to pack us a bag and we can just get a room tonight at ZaZa. We’ll call into tomorrow and maybe go to the beach, I know Galveston isn’t exactly the Bahamas but I want to spend a weekday enjoying my husband.”

I just watched her taking off her clothes and walking into her closet, she really was breathtaking. The truth was, I would trade one night of drinking and dancing and eating and sex with my wife for a hundred with a side ho.

“That’s a great idea baby; I’m looking forward to it. I’ll make reservations for a room downstairs. Hey… I forgot, let me go fill up and run to the liquor store to buy him a bottle before it turns nine. By the time I get back, you should be ready.”

I grabbed my keys, took the stairs two at a time and went down to the garage. I kept my second phone in my car and my wife hated driving so I wasn’t worried about her snooping around in here. I jumped in, let up the garage and backed out. I waited until I cleared the corner before I called Erica.

“Hey baby! Are you on your way, I’m almost ready!” I could hear the excitement in her voice.

“Change of plans E.” I didn’t really feel bad; I just sort of felt dirty for having to justify my actions to a woman I had no real ties to.

“You promised Allen!”

“I know I promised baby, but things happen. It’s not like I planned this, I just forgot. I’m going to make it up to you.”

“You’re always “going to make something up” to me! I get tired of the SAME SHIT OVER AND OVER! I WANT A REAL MAN IN MY LIFE! I’VE BEEN FUCKING WITH YOU FOR A YEAR AND WE’VE SPENT THREE NIGHTS TOGETHER!? THREE NIGHTS!!!” She was yelling and crying and I was so over it already.

“What do you want me to say?! You knew what was up when I met you; there was no cloak and dagger SHIT! I told you I was married, I told you my wife was going to come first! HELL, I WAS WITH MY WIFE AND YOU STILL CAME UP TO ME WHEN SHE WENT OUTSIDE TO TAKE THAT CALL! So, don’t start whining and shit tonight because I can’t take you to a movie. IT’S A FUCKING MOVIE!”

I didn’t mean to get mad at her, but how much can a man take. She pursued me, not the other way around. She knew I was married.


She loves me, is this bitch crazy? I was really about to lose it now.


I could here her hyperventilating.


She gets them in her name but I give her the cash, I guess she’s forgetting about that part.

“I’m just tired Allen… I’m just tired of not having anyone to hold me at night; you’re over there with her. Talking about HER day, eating dinner with HER, cooking dinner with HER, watching Monday Night Football WITH HER and I’m the bitch you call when you want your dick sucked before you go to work. How do you think that makes me feel?”

It should make you feel like you give good head, that’s a compliment. I just held the phone as I walked in the store. I guess she needed to vent.

“HOW DO YOU THINK THAT MAKES ME FUCKING FEEL!!!!? I JUST NEED MORE TIME DADDY! I just need more time; I miss you when we’re not together.”

I wanted to hang up in her face, I was excited about spending the night with my wife, but I wasn’t stupid. You didn’t just throw a woman away. Because she would find a way to get back at you.

“I know you miss me Erica, I know you do. And believe me when I tell you, I miss you too at times. But this isn’t going to end with me leaving my wife. With her going out the back door and you coming in the front. It never was and I won’t lie to you like it is now. If you can’t handle what we have, then you should move around, go get a man of your own baby girl. Someone that can be there when you call, someone that can walk around the Galleria with you or can take you to concerts or the Breakfast Club or Rockets Games; because I can’t do it! I can’t risk one of my wife’s friends seeing me with you. Yeah I know that shit sounds cold, but it’s the truth.”

There was a thin line between keeping it real and running game. I liked to think I played the line perfectly. I knew she wasn’t going anywhere.


And now that she’s all hot like this, the next time I see her, she’s going to do everything in her power to try and make me stay. Checkmate.

“Listen E, I’m not going to do this; I just called you to cancel for tonight because I figured you deserve that much. But all this drama, you yelling and crying… that’s not for me baby. I understand you’re hurt and you caught feelings but charge that shit to the game. The next time you want a man, go find one that’s either single or has a woman at home that you know for a fact you can replace. I know I’m as asshole for cheating on my wife, but she’s just always tired. Between her working and doing charitable and social events, she just doesn’t have time for the sort of sex drive I have. It was good meeting you Erica, I mean that.”

“Is this goodbye Allen… Seriously, you’re going to tell me goodbye over the phone. Don’t I at least deserve a goodbye in person… please? I won’t ask to see you again; I just want to see you one last time. Please…”

I just held the phone, I had every intention on seeing her young freaky ass again, but the thing was. I had to put her in her place. If I let her think she could just pull a temper tan tantrum and get her way… she would do it all the time.

There are two types of side chicks. The ones that need you financially and sexually, those are the best ones because it’s simply an arrangement. They probably date and have broke boyfriends, whatever. Maybe they’re just single and need some good sex. You can walk away from those women easy. And then you have single women that want something serious but their willing to settle for half a man. They have homes, cars, good jobs; they don’t need your money or even sex. They just want a relationship and they feel like they can take you. Those women are the worse because they love hard and they only get the good parts of you.

“I can’t come tonight or tomorrow. I’ll try to come by this weekend.”

“If you can’t come see me at least tomorrow, I’ll hurt myself Allen; I’m not saying this to get your attention. I’m saying it because I miss you; I just need to see you. You’ve done this to me, if you didn’t want me in your life, you shouldn’t have made love to me the way you did. Treated me the way you do!”

“I don’t want you to hurt yourself Erica, just calm down and I’ll see you this weekend. I have to go.”

I hung up the phone and cut if off, filled up and headed back towards our house to pick up my wife. I got a text on my regular cell; I could see it lightening up on my consul.

“If something happens to me or the baby, it’s on you!”


I didn’t spend a lot of time thinking about it, if she did hurt herself or a baby, what did it matter.


Truth or Dare ‘Explicit Content’

 “Truth or dare?”

We were sitting in Benjy’s at 10:30pm on a Thursday night; it was my first time seeing her since she called me over two weeks ago. The restaurant/ lounge was packed and we were in a booth in the corner. It was dark and the liquor was flowing. I had on a pair of black slacks, a white button down shirt and a black cashmere sweater. Issey Miyake of course, she was wearing a sexy dress that was backless and short. I had no idea what her perfume was but I did know it was alluring as hell.

“Truth.” She said

“How often do you think about me?” I took a sip of my beer and looked her in her very intoxicated eyes.

“Is that a trick question?” She could flirt without ever saying a word.

“It seemed like a pretty straight forward question to me.”

She took a sip of her wine and placed her hand on my thigh.

“I mean, if you’re asking how often I think about you as a person, that’s one thing. About our future, that’s another question; but if you’re asking how often I think about fucking you. That’s the money question.” She gave me courage to be freaky as hell, I think we did that for each other.

“You think too much! Why don’t you pick which one you want to tell me?!” She rubbed her hand along the inside of my thigh.

“I can’t focus the first half of my work day because I can’t get our morning conversations out of my mind, your voice, the way you’re frustrated at the morning traffic or excited about payday. The way you talk about your “toy” like it’s an adequate substitute. All those things make me want you.”

She licked her lips and motioned for the waiter.

“They make you want me how? What’s the first thing you think of doing?” She was setting the game off right.

“That’s more than one question; you’re breaking the rules of the game.” Her smile was electric!

“We can make our own rules tonight.”

The waiter walked over to the table, I knew her drinking habits better than I knew her religious views.

“Let me get another bottle of wine, another Bud Light Draft and four shots of Patron.”

“Yes sir, I’ll have that out in a minute.”

“Thank you.”

I picked up where we left off.

“The first thing I think about doing is kissing you; I guess I’m old fashioned like that. I like kissing, I love kissing or maybe I just love using my mouth on things. Who knows? Your voice makes me hard.”

“So you’re hard now?” She winked, I took her hand and placed it on my lap.

“Why don’t you see for yourself?”

“Are you daring me?”

“Yep, that’s exactly what I’m doing.”

“You have to say it and you also have to know you can’t beat me at this game. I’m the truth or dare Queen.”


She never looked down, never took her eyes off mine, never gave anyone in the restaurant a clue as to what she was doing. She pulled it completely out and touched it, rubbed around the tip and just played with and held it like it was hers. The way I was feeling about her, it was hers for as long as she wanted it.

“I guess you weren’t lying, he feels different since the last time I touched him, smoother. You’ve been using some new soap or something?”

“Nothing like that, you’ve just been acting funny for too long, so you’re out of touch with him.”

“I’m positive we’ll get back in touch tonight, I do miss him, even though he’s a little hard on me.”

“I thought you liked him better when he was hard on you, a little rough on you.”

“I like him like that but to be honest, I like him better when I can wake him up.”

“What’s your best method for waking him up? Do you think he responds better to your hands or your mouth?”

“That’s a good question; you’re his bestfriend, why don’t you tell me what he says to you.”

“He likes when you touch him, your hands are really small and soft, he feels big when one of those are wrapped around him. Hugging him; however, he is a sucker for that mouth of yours, those pouty lips.”

“Oh, that’s good to know. I forgot whose turn it is, I think it’s mine.”


“Truth or dare?”


“I dare you to slide your hand under my dress; I have a surprise for you.”

“Is the surprise dangerous?”

“Why would it be dangerous?”

“Why would you make it a dare?”

“I’m made it a dare because what’s under the dress is addictive but I’m sure you already know that. I’m making it a dare because this place is packed and someone has to know what we’re doing in this booth.”

Her dress was tight, she had to sit up a little and raise it up over her ass just so I could gain access. If the booth wasn’t so high everyone in the place would get a show because she was not wearing panties.

“I took them off in the car, once I smelled your cologne; I knew I wouldn’t need them.”

“So you’re reading minds now.”

“Not minds, just a mind. I’m in your head boy and you know it.”

“You’re right, it is addictive, you know I can’t control myself now.”

“Hmmmm…. Ohhh My Goood, that feels so good. I wish I could cut off your hand and take it with me.”

She was getting a little too comfortable, her eyes were closed and her head was titled to the side. When I saw the waiter walking towards us with our drinks I stopped playing around down there but I didn’t take my fingers out. It was too warm to move my hand.

He sat our drinks down.  

“Thank You.” I waited until he was out of ear hustle range. “But you wouldn’t know how to use my hand the way I do, we’re a package deal. Does my hand make you feel good?”

“Your hand makes me cum often.”

“You are pretty wet, I’m guessing no one has touched my girl since me right?”

“You would guess right, for some reason she’s really fond of you. At night, when I’m playing with my toy to get a good nights sleep, we like to imagine it’s your tongue pressing town on my clit. Vibrating and licking… Hmmmm….”

I had to change the subject, she was getting wetter and wetter and my probing was getting more and more intense. I was a drip away from picking her up and sitting her in my lap.

“It’s my turn, truth or date?”


“Hmmmm…. A drunken tongue speaks no lies, so I dare you to drink all four shots of patron, half the bottle of wine and your beer. Without stopping! If you’re chicken, don’t worry about.”

She leaned over and whispered in my ear, “Oh… And you can’t take your magic fingers out my pussy.”

“I’m always up for a challenge but if I throw up all over you, that’s your fault.” She laughed a really sexy, really drunk laugh.

Patron shot one, two, three four! I slammed the last shot glass down and burped.

I chugged the beer and placed my fist over my mouth, the wine was going to be the hardest because I hadn’t been drinking it all night but I was a winner.

“You don’t have to drink it; you can always admit that you’re a loser!” She licked her tongue out at me. I added another finger to the two I already had inside of her, I could feel her open her legs wider under the table.

I didn’t even bother putting the wine in a glass; I just took it to the head until I killed half the bottle. The fucking room was spinning. I put my hand on my face and closed my eyes tight. I was fucked up. I took my hands out of her and licked my fingers like I’d just ate some hot wings.

“You taste something you like?” She took that same hand and licked the last finger.

“Ummm, I had to see what has you so addicted, is my baby drunk?” She laughed and kissed me, the kiss was abrupt and hard but I damn sure kissed back. I was never into PDA but I didn’t care about much when it came to her.

“I want you to take me to your truck and let me ride your face and your dick! Can your drunk ass do that?!” I placed my hands on her waist while she sat up to pull her dress down.

“I can do that, I’m not that drunk, but I don’t have any condoms so what are we going to do?” We stood up and I paid the bill with a generous tip. She stood up on her tippy toes and licked the side of my face.

“I’ll just have to pull out and I’ll just have to swallow.”

“Let’s go…”

”Anticipation is the central ingredient in sexual desire. As sex has a major cognitive component, the most important element for desire is positive anticipation indeed; one name for pleasurable anticipation is excitement.”

 I’m dedicating this story to you and there is no way you can’t know who you are….

Thunderstorms, Trench Coats and High Heels

storms “Turn off the lights. Light a candle; because tonight I’m going to make love to you.” I was singing to her, rather badly but I loved to hear her laugh.

Last night was rough for her, grad school finals and taking on new responsibilities at work. As tired as I was, as she was, I stayed up with her. Sipping coffee, rubbing her shoulders, quizzing her on her notes. It was a long night but one I wouldn’t trade for the world.

“I’m going to need you to promise me you won’t show that sexy voice to anyone else. I don’t want to hurt someone for throwing panties at my man.” I could hear the smile in her voice.

Just like clockwork she called me as soon as she left work.

“Baby. Are you cooking tonight? I just want to come home and lay on the couch.” She still had her house. A house she paid bills at, that was twice as big as mines but whenever she spoke of lying on the couch at home she was talking about my couch.

Staying up all night with her, going straight to work and now I was going to have to make dinner too. A part of me knew she was spoiled but I didn’t have it in me to tell her no.

“I’ll take something out, how far are you?”

“I’m like 5 minutes away. I’m exiting 59 now. Oh babe! I see a cop, let me get off this phone before I pass this school zone! I’ll see you in a minute, love you! Bye.”

The call ended and I stood at the fridge looking inside wondering what the hell I was going to cook in this short notice. Settling on some chicken breast I threw them on defrost and started to grab what I needed when I heard a knock at the door.

I knew she had a key so when I looked out the window and saw her car in the driveway I figured she’d just forgotten to use it. When I opened the door my mouth dropped.

Standing there, a thin trench grey trench coat on, purple heels that added a good 4 inches to her height. Her hair bouncy and curly, holding a six pack in one hand, a pizza in the other. I didn’t offer to take the food out of her hands, didn’t move back so she could walk in. I just couldn’t stop looking at her. Couldn’t stop feeling like this wasn’t real. “I love you,”she mouthed to me. Unbuttoning the top button on her coat, showing me the lace underneath. “I want to suck….” She mouthed. The thunder was loud behind her, the rain even louder. My porch shielding her from the worst of it she licked her lips and smiled that smile that said so much.

Maybe it was a thank you for all I’d done knowing she needed to study and was fighting for a promotion. It could have been her being extra because we hadn’t had sex in a week. Or maybe she knew the draft was tonight and nothing went better with football then beer and pizza. Either way I took the stuff out of her hands. Pulled her inside and set the DVR to record what I obviously wasn’t going to be watching tonight.

You Deserved to be Kissed Right Here, Here and Most Importantly Right There

20131229-202752.jpgI always cringe when I hear people say, “I don’t like kissing.” A part of me just wants to shake them and say, “Do you know what you’re missing?!” Or “You probably just haven’t found someone to do it right yet!”

There is nothing and I mean nothing more intimate and perfect than a kiss that’s at just the right time and in just the right place. I can’t draw worth a lick but I imagine it’s like an artist that is in a groove. When lips connect and the intensity starts to pick up, that moment when she takes a breath and you move to her neck, right below her ear. I get why people love sex, I’m a man. To me sex is a point of no return. Kissing is different because even though it’s so intimate there’s still something innocent about it.

It can be a soft kiss while waiting for a movie to start. It can be one of those, “I can’t wait to take your clothes off kisses,” up against a door when you know you need to leave. Don’t forget about the she’s lying on her stomach, sleeping, napping, reading a book or playing her phone and you start to kiss the back of her thighs or her ass. Those are the kisses when both of you know whatever plans you had are going to be postponed. What’s that jewelry store commercial, “Every kiss begins with Kay.” Well, most great memories begin with a kiss.

Confidence has always come natural to me but I’m not that guy that can’t take direction. I can never know a grown woman’s body better than she knows it. Where she wants to get kissed, what feels good, how much pressure to apply.

I could sit in a couch, the TV on mute. No music, no gimmicks and just kiss and touch and flirt for hours. The time goes by so fast when she’s straddling you and her hearts beating and both of you are on the edge of so much pleasure.

Kissing is what I miss most about not having a woman in my life. Knowing I can kiss her at 4am with morning breath. Knowing I can kiss her after a bad day.

A forehead.
A belly button.
A nipple.
The nape of a neck.
The small of a back.

Kissing is Everything.

Taste This for Me

At first I thought it was in my head but every time I ignored it the knock got louder. Getting up from my desk, having to hold the wall for a second not realizing how much I’d drank I walked to the door.

Looking out the window I recognized her car. I wasn’t sure what she was doing here but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t smile.

Opening the door, her bouncing from one foot to the next in the short dress she stepped inside and hugged me. Her body sinking into mines, sucking up my warmth. For minutes nothing was said, neither of us moved. My back against the door, my hands rubbing her back, rubbing her ass. Her squeezing me like I’d run away if she let go.

“How did you know I didn’t have company?” I said it playfully but I was serious.

“Fuck whatever company you would have had. ” She said it squeezing me tighter but I knew her. She would have knocked on the door anyway.

Going to the couch, her hand on mines. I was expecting her to sit next to me but she straddled me. Looking me in my eyes, rubbing my hair, tracing my lips with her fingers.

“Can I ask you a question?” She asked.

“Of course.” I traced her nipples with my tongue through her dress.

“Instead of writing about me, why not just call me? Text me?” She kissed me forehead and placed her hands behind my head.

“How do you know I’m writing about you? It’s fiction remember.” Standing up, stepping out of her panties and climbing back on top she smiled and started to kiss my neck.

“Save that for your groupies writer. You forget who I am? Taste this for me.” Putting her fingers between her legs and putting them to my mouth I never took my eyes off of her.

“I’m drunk, I’m horny, all I want is some head. To ride your dick. And an omelette. If the omelette is good maybe I’ll suck your dick all nasty like you like it.” While she was talking she was pulling it out. Spitting on her fingers, rubbing it, looking at me she sat on it.

Her hands on my head, my hands on her hips, our rhythm perfect. My fit inside of her perfect. No words were spoken after that, no music playing in the background or adjusting positions. Just the sounds of her wetness absorbing my hardness. Just the sounds of pleasure before the dawn hours.


Hey Stranger (Explicit Content)

“Hey Stranger.”

That’s how it started. Sitting on my couch, drinking a bottle of wine, watching the Chiefs and Broncos. When I first got the text I didn’t even recognize the number. I was lonely though, the Best Man Holiday had me thinking about love and life. So at that point I really didn’t care who it was.

“In driving so I shouldn’t be texting. WYD?”

Still having no idea who it was and not in the mood for a guessing game I finished another glass of wine and pressed call. It took a couple rings but when she answered I recognized the voice right away. I should have hung up the phone and blocked the number but for whatever reason I didn’t.

“I’m happy you called, I almost hit a curb trying to text. I was driving home from a friends and passed up P.F. Changs and thought about you. You remember that night?”

What did she want me to say? Of course I remembered that night. That night was what I loved about her and what I hated about her. She was aggressive, sexy, motivating. The problem was when a woman is that sensual all I could think about was, “If she’s not doing this freaky shit with me then who’s she doing it with?”

“I don’t want to go home. Can I come see you?”

She didn’t say it with her usual confidence, I knew if she was calling me then something wasn’t right. As explosive as our love making was that was never what our relationship was about. In the two years we knew each other I’d probably been inside of her less than 10 times. Our connection was one of lost souls. A connection I missed.

“Do you still remember the address?”

“I’m exiting the freeway now, I should be there in a minute.”

I guess there was little doubt in both our minds I wouldn’t say no. Standing on the porch waiting to see her headlights coming down the quiet street I was more excited then I was willing to admit to myself.

She pulled into my driveway, I could see her checking her face in the mirror. Walking towards me neuter of us could stop from smiling. Whether they were nervous smiles or genuine I had no idea. She walked in, not waiting on me to invite her in.

Before I knew it I had her pinned against the door. Her purse on the floor, her arms wrapped around my neck. My hands rubbing her stomach, tracing the outline if her bra. Desire isn’t something you can explain, our hunger for each other was timeless. Maybe I was lonely and she was vulnerable and that combination had my fingers inside her warmth. That bond had my tongue making a trail from her belly button to that magic button.

The more I kissed her, the more I felt her body responding, the more I wanted to please her. The more I needed to make her remember her pussy once belonged to me! Tugging at her jeans, sitting her left should on my thigh I buried my face inside her! The smell, the taste, the warmth of the walls I once called home were calling me.

“Eat it baby! Put your whole fucking face in it! Lick my ass!”

With us nasty was necessary, it was the norm! Things I’d done with her, to her! I would take to my grave.

Bending her over, spreading her ass cheeks and putting my thumb inside I just watched her wiggle. Pulling her panties to the side, rubbing my dick against her wetness her warmth felt like home. For a second I thought why aren’t I using a condom? Why does this feel so fucking right? My tears fell, the pleasure and comfort of the wetness surrounding my dick was beyond explainable…