Why Can’t Your Man Do It? Friendships Change When You’re In A Relationship; As They Should
It’s a valid question. “Why can’t your man do it? It may seem awkward coming from a man you’ve been friends with for years but it’s a legit question. You need your inspection sticker, you need your car washed, you need a ride to the airport at 5am? The guy you could have called at any time to be there for you is now asking you, “Why can’t your man do it?” You look at the phone like, “You’ve done it a million times before, I didn’t think I needed to give you an explanation.”
If you’re over 25 reading this you’ve been at the point in your life where you were single and you have that seriously cool friend of the opposite sex. You want to go to LA for your birthday, you call your friend. There’s no awkward “we almost kissed moments.” There’s no, “I know we’re just friends but…” It’s strictly platonic and you two just genuinely like each other’s company. Concerts, lunch’s, 2am conversations about life and disappointments and dreams that don’t end with you asking them “So what are you wearing right now?”
Men aren’t selfish or territorial; don’t mistake your guy friend that no longer wants to be there for being any of those things. Men are just logical. Somewhere in the picture there’s a guy she’s cooking for, smiling for, kissing, getting jealous over. That’s the man that should be doing the things he used to do and he’s right.
Relationships are inherently selfish. You start to blow off friends and family you’ve spent years with because you fall in love. You stop wanting to go to happy hours with your friends and go to happy hour with your man or woman. A “Hungover” type night in Vegas with your people gets replaced with some Bed and Breakfast in Rhode Island or North Carolina you saw on Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives on Food Network. It isn’t personal, it isn’t you acting funny, it’s just the evolution of life. So if you’re doing all this, when you have a problem, your man should be the one you go to. Your man should be the one that is your shoulder to cry on. He should be the one that helps you when the bank freezes your account because of suspicious behavior. Don’t be mad at your guy friend for telling you that. Respect the fact he gets that your priorities have changed and he just wants you to be with a man that can take care of you.