Finding Motivation Is Key

I haven’t been writing a lot in 2018 on a personal level because I decided to focus more on the business side of writing. Though that wasn’t the only reason. I also felt like I’d run out of things to say. So often as creatives and writers especially you get your motivation from real life, I look at like a battery. The more you charge it, the more powerful it becomes. For me 2018 was a year of growth and learning. Taking in moments as opposed to sharing them.

I’ve become a father and when I tell you it’s the most amazing thing I’ve ever felt, I’m not even sure that does it justice. Just holding him and looking at him and realizing that he’s a part of me is something that changes who you are as a man. Not just your priorities but I’ve never felt love like I feel love when I look at him.

I thought it would gross me out to change diapers or get spit up on but I find myself excited when he takes a poop because I know it means he isn’t constipated or gassy. When he spits up and looks at me and smiles, it’s because I know he got a good burp in or he ate too much and now he’s relieved. I’ll be driving to work and laugh at something he did and it brings joy to my life. Being a father is amazing and he can’t even play outside yet. I can just imagine what it’ll be like when he’s walking and running.

Having my son and living life has given me stories to write about, stories to focus on. Not just when it comes to my blog but when it comes to novels and scripts. Sitting back and watching, listening, ingesting the world around me.

I once saw this meme that said, “Be careful what you say around me, I’m a writer and anything you say or do may be used in a story.”

I have never related to anything so much in my life. 2018 pushed a button inside of me, a button which reminded me that life isn’t as short or long as we think it is. Life is just life. You live in the moment, you live in the day and before you know it, years have went by. What did you do with those years? What did you create? Who did you help? What did you inspire?

I’m sitting in my office writing this on a Saturday morning and before I know it it’ll be February and before I know it, it’ll be August. 2018 will be my last year viewing the world from the sidelines. I’m tired of playing it safe. I want to take risk and try new things. Write new genres and push myself professionally.

Being unhappy or unmotivated for the sake of it isn’t the move anymore. Make this last month of 2018 count.

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The Depth of A Sister’s Love: Excerpt One

img_2555A sneak peek into The Depth of A Sisters Love

He was no longer the first call she made when she had good news.

Kisses against the refrigerator door were replaced with arguments against the front door.

Naked bodies cuddling in the moonlight a distant memory, now simply two strangers sharing a bed ignoring the fact that neither could sleep.

What do you say to someone that you know loves you but you also know is no longer in love with you? People have written love songs for years about missing the love of their life or wanting their lover back, who has ever written a love song about the love fading away?

Standing at the door watching her place the last of her things in her car he felt the tears in his eyes. Tears not caused by a broken heart but tears of regret. What could have been, should have been, had their beginning been different, had he been more willing to be the man she deserved?

She took her time trying to make the bags fit in a car that wasn’t made for moving. Glancing back at him trying to be strong even though strength was the last thing on her mind. She’d yelled and screamed and made threats about how he would regret it but in the end, when all her energy was gone and the facade of a potentially great love was shattered. She knew the truth. Her heart was no longer in it and it would hurt her losing a friend more than it would hurt her to lose the man.

No tearful goodbyes asking her to stay.

No midnight text messages telling her he needed her to come home.

Love meant needing to see her happy. It meant needing to see her smile. Being with him brought a storm to her life that she was willing to brave no matter what. What he knew that she didn’t was that storms weren’t meant to last forever. Storms were beautiful nightmares.

Watching her speed down the street hear taillights fading as she turned the corner he knew he’d made the right decision. He knew she’d fine happiness in the world she could never find with a man like him.

Every corner in the house, every couch, every chair, every inch of his desk was a reminder of her smile, of her innocence, of their passion. Reminders that would burn deepest when the nights are the quietest. Looking in his phone there were dozens, hundreds pictures of her. Some innocent, some that only he would ever see, the memories too much to handle.

In the silence he closed his eyes wanting to hear her laughter, wanting to hear her car thump over the gate. In the silence he wanted to be selfish.

“I have nothing, you took it all and now you’ve taken my heart. You said you’d break me and you did, I’m too good for you.” Her words a constant reminder of his failures as a man.

He now knew the meaning of love songs and looking at the blood moon out his window he smiled as though he’d made the revelation of a lifetime.

“Why are they called love songs when the words that inspire them hurt like hell.”

Lying down on the floor he just listened to the music and stopped fighting the pain.

BOOM!!!!!

The sound of metal hitting metal jarred him awake! Jumping up and looking around he heard it again!

BOOM!!!!!

“I told you not to hurt me! You must be crazy to think I’m the only one that’s going to walk away from this devastated.” He looked out the window to see her and her younger sister standing on his front porch with baseball bats, her older sister was leaning against the car.

He laughed, “Now I see why they call them love songs. You have to be crazy in love to put up with this shit.”

Believe You’re Worth Everything You Desire

  Comfort. 

Comfort is a great word. When I think of comfort I think of a pair of boxers fresh out the dryer after a hot shower, a cold beer, my couch and a good game. For some comfort is a pint of Blue Bell, thick fuzzy socks and stalking their favorite people on Instagram. Comfort can be an amazing thing but it can also be dangerous to growth, success and passion. 

When you become comfortable at a job or in a relationship it’s human nature to take your foot off the gas. It becomes the most logical thing in the world to believe you are we’re you’re supposed to be. That’s where belief has to come in; the belief that you can soar past your station in life. No one can believe in us like we can believe in us. Like we have to believe in us. 

Social media leads so many into a false sense of accomplishment. I’ve had hundreds or likes on a post or hundreds of shares on a blog and it’s a good feeling knowing people follow you but it no where near compare to the feeling of receiving a check. Of having that belief that if I stop giving away my services for free; that people will still buy into me. If you desire greatness in life there’s no formula that allows you to jump the line. Invest in yourself, put time into your talent, support others and network and just work your tail off! 

At the age of 32 there are days where I feel like I haven’t accomplished a thing. Days where my confidence and aggression and sense of hope feel like they’re fading. Then there are days where I see the horizon. I see the progress. I see the company and writing growing and evolving. Either way on either day I’m never losing the belief that I can get where I want to get. I’m never going to doubt that God has a plan for me and that plan includes any struggles and missteps I might endure. 

In every great man or woman’s life there has come a point where they decided the risk was worth the reward. Some sacrificed steady jobs, some the loves of their lives and some their piece of mind. That’s a decision you’ll have to make on your own. 
Demez F. White 

Overcome Inspire and Achieve: Pain Is Power Inc.

Gregory Jones Jr.

Gregory Jones Jr.

The parking lot is filled with luxury cars, there’s a live band playing while the crowd mingles and chats. Smiles and takes pictures. The women are in dresses and hats, the men in summer suits, mostly tailored. This isn’t the Kentucky Derby or a corporate luncheon. This group is in the heart of 5th Ward which is a neighborhood in Houston, TX. A neighborhood located in the backdrop of Downtown, filled with poverty, crime and opportunities lost.

Today they have gathered to try to change the path of the children at John Marshall Middle School. The library is filled with reminders to the kids, education, ambition, drive, hope. Even though the smiles are plentiful and the food is amazing no one is forgetting why they are there. Especially the man who has put it all together, the man who has not waivered even though most of the charities expenses have come out of his and his board members pockets.

Gregory R. Jones Jr. is the Board President and Founder of Pain is Power Inc. and his message is simple.

“At one time or another, we all face challenges whether they be financial, health-related, personal or otherwise. We believe that if it wasn’t for the strength gained by overcoming such challenges, many of the world’s most successful people would not have acquired two of the most vital characteristics to greatness: courage and perseverance. Our goal is to inspire and cultivate those same characteristics and life skills to help the underserved youth and children in our communities realize their greatness.”

Gregory, like a lot of men and women at this launch event, didn’t grow up with a silver spoon in his mouth. Coming from an impoverished neighborhood in Dallas, TX he’s seen what it’s like to make it out and he’s also seen what it’s like for those that haven’t.

“What we see a lot of is the dream gap. Kids that want to be musicians, basketball players, athletes and after that nothing. We want to change that, to show them that there’s so much more out there. Pain Is Power, Inc., focuses on three fundamental principles: overcome, inspire, achieve. We believe, with the right skills, anyone can overcome any difficulties presented in life. Through those triumphs, lessons are learned which help inspire us to aspire for more and achieve success.”

Something else that stood out to me about Gregory and Pain is Power is that they are putting their money and time on the line and doing things the right way.

“Up until today we’ve probably received a total of about two hundred dollars in contributions. All our paperwork is filed and pending with the IRS. I believe it’s important that non-profits show they are serious before they start to ask for money.”

The principal at John Marshall Middle School, Michael Harrison, is all in favor of the program, that’s why he opened the doors today and allowed the program the opportunity.

“When I initially offered the contest to the kids, (the turn down for what contest) we had an overwhelming number of kids to sign up. Four years ago when I become principal here things were rough and we’ve done a good job of not only changing the test scores and attendance but of changing the mindsets of these children. This program helps us do that.”

You can read more about Pain Is Power Inc. and also donate money or time at www.painispower.org.

Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday

Today is June 12, 2014 and for a lot of people it’s just a Thursday before the weekend. Today is a little more special than that though. Today is her birthday. Now we aren’t cool enough anymore for me to text her or call her or send any messages so I won’t. I can however talk about her on my blog because it’s my blog.

This woman changed my life for the better. She made me believe that I could be a great writer, she listened to me when I was down, talked to me when I needed real advice. There was never a point where I doubted her sincerity. Not when it came to wanting the best for me.

So often we lose focus. Someone hurts us or lies to us or things don’t end well so we decide to throw the baby out with the bath water. That’s not how life works though, just because you see the bad in someone doesn’t mean you forget about all the good in them.

I’ve had the pleasure of knowing a lot of women in my life, it comes with being a writer. I can honestly say that none of them compare to the birthday girl. Of course there’s been women that were better for me, that were sweeter, that were cooler. None of them pushed me though, not like she did.

It’s been over a year since I’ve spoken to her and I’ve been good with it for awhile. So now I’m only down to writing about her once a year, one June 12th. She’s one of those women that just make you better, her confidence in you can make you feel as though you can move mountains.

Happy Birthday! I hope you get everything you desire and more.
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