Why Can’t Your Man Do It? Friendships Change When You’re In A Relationship; As They Should

IMG_0701 Why Can’t Your Man Do It? Friendships Change When You’re In A Relationship; As They Should

It’s a valid question. “Why can’t your man do it? It may seem awkward coming from a man you’ve been friends with for years but it’s a legit question. You need your inspection sticker, you need your car washed, you need a ride to the airport at 5am? The guy you could have called at any time to be there for you is now asking you, “Why can’t your man do it?” You look at the phone like, “You’ve done it a million times before, I didn’t think I needed to give you an explanation.”

If you’re over 25 reading this you’ve been at the point in your life where you were single and you have that seriously cool friend of the opposite sex. You want to go to LA for your birthday, you call your friend. There’s no awkward “we almost kissed moments.” There’s no, “I know we’re just friends but…” It’s strictly platonic and you two just genuinely like each other’s company. Concerts, lunch’s, 2am conversations about life and disappointments and dreams that don’t end with you asking them “So what are you wearing right now?”

Men aren’t selfish or territorial; don’t mistake your guy friend that no longer wants to be there for being any of those things. Men are just logical. Somewhere in the picture there’s a guy she’s cooking for, smiling for, kissing, getting jealous over. That’s the man that should be doing the things he used to do and he’s right.

Relationships are inherently selfish. You start to blow off friends and family you’ve spent years with because you fall in love. You stop wanting to go to happy hours with your friends and go to happy hour with your man or woman. A “Hungover” type night in Vegas with your people gets replaced with some Bed and Breakfast in Rhode Island or North Carolina you saw on Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives on Food Network. It isn’t personal, it isn’t you acting funny, it’s just the evolution of life. So if you’re doing all this, when you have a problem, your man should be the one you go to. Your man should be the one that is your shoulder to cry on. He should be the one that helps you when the bank freezes your account because of suspicious behavior. Don’t be mad at your guy friend for telling you that. Respect the fact he gets that your priorities have changed and he just wants you to be with a man that can take care of you.

4 Reasons Why Kissing Is Still the Pinnacle of Intimacy

Dope Instagram Pic 1. Soft lips still have to be the best cure for a long day. Trends change, styles change, but kissing a woman after a great first date or before you leave for work. That will never change.

2. We all remember our first kiss. Not the one when you’re at the 8th grade prom but that first real kiss when you feel something. Call it sparks, call it love, call it desire. That kiss that makes you want to hold her hand, that kiss that makes you forget time and space and you look up and it’s been two hours. No matter how old we get, those moments still exist.

3. Kissing is erotic but it’s also incredibly innocent. One of my favorite sermons is when my pastor said, “Don’t put yourself in situations where you can’t control your body and your desires. You can say you want to wait until marriage or don’t want to move fast but kissing on a couch in the dark at midnight isn’t going to help you reach that goal.” Kissing is what we make it. It can be a stolen kiss in the elevator leaving a movie or in a parking garage or it can be the introduction to something more.

4. There comes a time in a man’s life where he has to make a decision. Is this the woman I want to kiss for the rest of my life. Not just when there’s candles burning and R. Kelly playing but when she’s just gave birth to your child and it’s a kiss on the forehead. When she’s just finished jogging and is incredibly sweaty and it’s a peck on the lips letting her know you’re proud of her. A kiss on the back of her neck while you’re watching your son or daughter sleep. These are the kisses that define us. The kisses that we relate to moments we live for.

5 Non- Sensual Ways to Show Affection and Intimacy

One- Grocery shopping together, this leads to spending time together, laughing, people watching. There’s something incredibly intimate about buying frozen veggies and Honey Nut Cheerios.

Two- A woman sending you pictures while she’s trying on clothes at a store. “Hey babe, do you like this?” “How does this look on me?” Not this new trend of taking pictures and posting them online but knowing the only opinion that matters to her is yours, that’s cool.

Three- Working out together. Now to be honest I don’t really do this but I have and the competition, the sweating, the conversation. You’re literally spending 45 minutes to an hour just bonding.

Four- Helping her take off nail polish or take out braids. You get to see her like few people do and because she’s yours it’s okay. For a second you think about how your boys would laugh if they saw you sitting with her foot in your lap while you wipe away polish. For a second you think how gay you must look taking out braids hoping you don’t cut her real hair and make her go off. Then you realize being here doing this with her is better than front row at a Mayweather- Pacquio fight. That’s intimacy, that’s affection, that’s a relationship.

Five- Leaving somewhere together. A party, a restaurant, the movies. That drive home knowing you’re the one taking her home when every guy in the room was looking at her. Holding her hand, her hand on your thigh, her hand rubbing your neck. Not in a sexual way but in a comfortable way like she just likes touching you. It’s hard to explain if you’re not a man that gets it but for whatever reason when a woman loves you or is just into you she likes touching you.

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The Good Ones Go If You Wait Too Long

Stop Waiting

Stop Waiting

1. Stop being prideful, you know what pride gets you? A bottle of gin and an empty house. If you miss her, tell her. Don’t text, don’t be passive aggressive on social media. Just call her or go see her and tell her.

2. Please don’t let social media and all these articles blow your head up. I don’t care how many single people there are in this world, if someone is sexy and smart and sweet. They’ll have suitors. No matter how much she’s into you, no matter how much of your shit she takes. There will come a day when her interest dies and there won’t be any turning back.

3. Don’t be the guy that’s afraid to get rejected. You wait and wait and wait not knowing if she’ll like “A guy like me.” Send that message, be honest, be likable. Don’t hide in the shadows hoping and wishing and when you finally get the courage she’s taken. You know how that’s going to feel when she responds, “I would have said yes two weeks ago but I’ve met someone.” Maybe she’s just being nice but maybe she’s telling the truth and your future wife will be drinking hot chocolate in her panties and tank top with someone else.

4. We all like to feel important. It doesn’t make you lame or thirsty for calling the same day you got her number. You aren’t pressed if you see her on Friday night and when you call and tell her you made it home; you ask her out on Saturday. If she’s important to you, if spending time with her feels better than spending time with anyone else in your life. Don’t act like it doesn’t. Letting her know you want to see more of her isn’t creepy, it’s being a man.

5. I once read an article about the art of going in for a goodnight kiss. You should look into her eyes and wait for the right moment and not be too aggressive. That’s loser talk! Look, when you go in for a kiss there can’t be any hesitation. If she doesn’t want that, you’ll know before you’re five feet within her space. Women will deal with assholes, broke guys, pretty boys but what they won’t deal with; is scary men. Don’t be the guy that turns her on with your conversation, cologne, mannerisms and then falls into the “Just a Friend Zone” because you never took the chance to take it to a more intimate level.

You Deserved to be Kissed Right Here, Here and Most Importantly Right There

20131229-202752.jpgI always cringe when I hear people say, “I don’t like kissing.” A part of me just wants to shake them and say, “Do you know what you’re missing?!” Or “You probably just haven’t found someone to do it right yet!”

There is nothing and I mean nothing more intimate and perfect than a kiss that’s at just the right time and in just the right place. I can’t draw worth a lick but I imagine it’s like an artist that is in a groove. When lips connect and the intensity starts to pick up, that moment when she takes a breath and you move to her neck, right below her ear. I get why people love sex, I’m a man. To me sex is a point of no return. Kissing is different because even though it’s so intimate there’s still something innocent about it.

It can be a soft kiss while waiting for a movie to start. It can be one of those, “I can’t wait to take your clothes off kisses,” up against a door when you know you need to leave. Don’t forget about the she’s lying on her stomach, sleeping, napping, reading a book or playing her phone and you start to kiss the back of her thighs or her ass. Those are the kisses when both of you know whatever plans you had are going to be postponed. What’s that jewelry store commercial, “Every kiss begins with Kay.” Well, most great memories begin with a kiss.

Confidence has always come natural to me but I’m not that guy that can’t take direction. I can never know a grown woman’s body better than she knows it. Where she wants to get kissed, what feels good, how much pressure to apply.

I could sit in a couch, the TV on mute. No music, no gimmicks and just kiss and touch and flirt for hours. The time goes by so fast when she’s straddling you and her hearts beating and both of you are on the edge of so much pleasure.

Kissing is what I miss most about not having a woman in my life. Knowing I can kiss her at 4am with morning breath. Knowing I can kiss her after a bad day.

A forehead.
A belly button.
A nipple.
The nape of a neck.
The small of a back.
Lips.

Kissing is Everything.

Touch It For Me Now… (Explicit Content)

dress-naked.jpg “I was bored at work today so I put my finger inside to see how tight it was, I think these kegals have been working.” I could tell she was whispering, she liked talking like this when there were people around. I could hear them talking in the background.

“I was sitting at my desk and I know you were out of town two weeks ago and last week mother nature was visiting, I’m feigning over here.”
Her voice wasn’t calm anymore, I’m sure to anyone watching they couldn’t tell the difference but I could. It was a subtle shift in her tone.

“What if I told you I want you to touch your pussy for me right now.” She laughed, she laughed because she wanted to talk shit back but she knew that I knew she couldn’t. To every one in that room she’d probably never said a curse word in her life. If only they knew her mouth like I did.

“I’d tell you that my current situation doesn’t allow me access to those files at the moment but I can get them to you shortly.”

“Touch it right now!”

Now it was time for my tone to change. I wasn’t laughing or playing. Standing up and closing my office door I listened to her breathe.

“Those files are locked up tight; you’re being unreasonable. Give me some time.”

Knowing what she was thinking, knowing she was wet was making this serious for me. Two weeks was a long time for us. We were both about to explode.

“Right now I’m unbuttoning your blouse and biting your nipples through your bra. I’m going to suck them but I like doing this first because I know how much you want me to pull them out. Leave your heels on, leave your skirt on, I’m going to have you step out your panties and I’ll put them in my pocket for safe keeping.”

I paused so that she would do what I knew she would do.

“Please keep going sir, I’m listening.theres still time before my meeting starts.”

“Eating pussy is an art. Rubbing your clit with my thumb, watching you watch how wet you sound. It’s warm, tight like you said it was. Performing on you is like kissing you. It starts with just my lips and then I use my tongue. The more you moan, the more you move your hips, the more you play in my hair; the harder I suck. You jump when I slide a third finger in your ass but you don’t stop me. One for the clit, one for your pussy and one for your ass. Not too deep but deep enough for you to cum. Would you like to sit on my face?”

“I’m touching the file right now. I found a way to get a quick look at it. I’d like to do more but I just can’t get full access at the moment.”

Feeling how hard I was, thinking about her in that conference room trying her best not to get caught touching herself under the table.

“All I’ve been thinking about is cumming in you. I love how nasty you get when you’re riding me. How in control you are. My dick fits inside of you like a glove. What you’re touching right now, that heat you feel on your finger tips. It’s mines. I want you to climb off my dick and taste how you taste. I want to watch you suck your juices off what’s yours.

Click… I put the phone down knowing she couldn’t take it anymore. My phone vibrated with a text seconds later.

“I’m going to fuck the shit out of you when I get out of this damn meeting! Leave work now and go get what we need for the weekend because neither of us are leaving your house until Monday morning! It is yours by the way!”

He Tried to Domesticate You; I Just Want to Liberate You

my wifeThere are times I have these nights where I want to be incredibly honest. I think tonight is one of those nights. Look, every man want s a woman he’s proud to call his own. A woman that’s kind and gentle and has qualities that will make her a good wife and a great mother. What we don’t like to admit though is that not every woman is meant to be those things. Some women are just meant to be wild.

Men are jealous by nature, we’re selfish by nature. Even the most understanding of us feel a certain way about other men talking to the women we love. The thing is though, not every woman is meant to be domesticated. Not every woman is meant to be meek. He wants that, he needs that. I can respect that. That isn’t you though. You’re a freak. You like sex in the car, you like biting and scratching and fighting. You need that passion and emotion and those moments when you can run wild without feeling guilty. He can’t see that, I can.

Maybe one day you’ll be ready to settle down and be the woman he wants. I don’t see today being that day.