5 Life Lessons I Learned In the Last Week of 2015

photo(1)This has been a tough week. My grandmother passing hasn’t really hit me yet, at least I don’t think it has. So, I’ll do what I do best and write. Even though it’s only Tuesday, we only have two days left in 2015 and these are the life lessons I’ve learned.

5- Life isn’t about what happens when someone is sick or dying or gone. Life is about the moments when they’re here. The moments you have an opportunity to do right by them. It’s easy to cry once their gone but it’s even easier to talk to them and make them laugh and be there for them when it’s inconvenient. Anyone can be a good grandson or husband or boyfriend on a beautiful Sunday afternoon when the Texans aren’t playing. Can you be a good person when you’ve just gotten off work, your feet hurt and you have to fight traffic? Give people their flowers while they’re living or you will regret it.

4- Character is who people are when they’re scared. You ever see the zombie movies where two people are running and one of them pushes the other down so they can get away. That’s sort of what life is. You’re either willing to be a good person and do the right thing when your heart is beating out your chest and you feel like your back is against the wall or you’re not. Sometimes being a good person won’t pay off right away but it will pay off. Karma is a living, breathing thing.

3- You should always be honest but not everyone deserves or appreciates it. Giving someone a piece of your mind or checking someone may make you feel good for a moment but we don’t always have to keep it real. Sometimes smiling and walking away hurt people so much more than yelling at them or “checking them.” It won’t feel good to bite your tongue. It won’t feel good to see someone doing wrong or going down a wrong path and knowing you can’t stop them. That’s life though, some people only learn by getting burned.

2- Build your own home before you try and help others. I see so many good natured people that give and give and give and then they look up and don’t have anything? You can’t help people if you haven’t taken the time to look out for yourself. My grandparents weren’t wealthy, my mother and father aren’t wealthy. Anything I build in this life, I will build not because of handouts or luck. I will build based off the life lessons I was taught. Rome wasn’t built in a day. Neither are wealth, families, friendships. You want a garage, start with a screwdriver. You want a office, start with a pen. No one is obligated to help us. We have to help ourselves.

1- Be a man that gives more than you take. I can’t take care of a woman at this point in my life. I’m okay with that but what I can do is take on a bigger burden. Maybe I don’t pay all the bills but I pay the biggest bills. Maybe I don’t always clean up but her car stays clean and I take out the trash. Have a home, don’t move in a with a woman. Go to work and if you have children, let them see you treating their mother like a woman that means the world to you.

4 Reasons Why Loving One Woman Is Cooler Than Chasing A Hundred Women

  It’s always been important to me that I be the man I write about. Let’s just be honest, we live in an age where most men aren’t what they “post to be.” It’s easy to hop online and tell everyone what you’d do if you had a wife or girlfriend but what’s not easy is actually being that man. Sacrificing, putting aside pride and just humbling yourself in the name of love and commitment. 

One- Being romantic and talking about your woman or relationship doesn’t make you weak; it makes you an adult. I’m not saying post a dozen selfies a week of your mate or constantly talk about them but I’m saying it’s okay to let the world know how special someone is to you. So many men feel like they’re losing when they commit. Losing female options, freedom, etc but we tend to forget treating a woman right, being the man she adore because you’re sincere means you’re winning. 

Two- I’m vulnerable at times. Wait a minute. I said that too low, I’M VULNERABLE AT TIMES! You hear me now? It’s okay to say that you need someone to talk to. That you need that person to see you at your worst and not judge you. There’s nothing cool about being in a dark place and not having one woman to call because you’ve treated them all like options. Why should or would a woman give you her all when you’re constantly making it clear she’s just not that important? Does that make sense?

Three- Life is not a movie. There are no James Bonds in real life. If there were he’d be in dialysis from drinking too much or probably have HIV from sleeping around. For as much as music and memes tell us that women love being side chicks and aren’t loyal… That’s sort of bullsh**. Women are quite loyal and hate guys that cheat. So if you want your stock to go up, if you want women to admire you. Be faithful. Don’t text at 3am, don’t meet them for drinks, don’t be that guy that’s taken and acts single. Be a good man. You fight with your girl, don’t vent on FB, get a bottle and go outside and drink until you’re ready to apologize. The American way. Women adore good men and if the day comes when you’re single. They’ll remember the man that loved his woman and did right by her. Not the cheating asshole. 

Four- Have you ever seen someone smile because you’re smiling? Have you ever did something really small and it made her day? Have you ever had a toothache or been constipated and she made it better? You don’t get that comfort level, that feeling of “I’m hurting so she’s hurting” bouncing from woman to woman. When I was younger I was a horrible boyfriend. When we broke up and I was single I was a horrible guy to date. I lied a lot, drank too much, was selfish and more importantly messed over too many good girls. I can’t change who I was but what I can do is tell other men it’s never too late. It won’t be easy but it’ll be worth it.