Let me be perfectly clear about what this blog is about. I’m not one of those writers or men that’s going to sit here and pretend like men won’t always have women on the side. This isn’t me condoning it nor saying it’s okay, it’s simply me acknowledging that adultery and creeping exist. However, no matter how attractive or interesting the woman or man in some cases on the side is, know this… There is rarely a future for him or her with the person they’re cheating with. We as a society are very forgiving of the man that cheats on his wife but rarely do we forgive the women that “drove” him to that sin. These five are rational reasons why or in some cases irrational.
Three- Society- People love talented and strong men, we are forgiving of these men despite their flaws. Their wives forgive them, their girlfriends forgive them, their children forgive them. The companies they run or nations they lead or stadiums they fill forgive them. Magic Johnson caught and could have given them HIV and he’s loved, Bill Clinton got head in the oval office and people are saying he saved President Obama’s Presidency. Athletes, musicians, authors and everyday men get other women pregnant or lie and a year later it’s like it was a small inconvenience. So where does that blame go, where does the hate and resentment and judgment go? It goes to the woman, it goes to the woman that had the audacity to fall for a married man or man in a relationship. We don’t care what he told her or if he lied or manipulated her, we just know she broke up a marriage and we hate her for it regardless if that’s the truth of not.
Two- Perfection- Do you know why so many men fall so hard for the woman on the side? It’s not the sex, most girlfriends and wives are just as horny as we are. It’s the perceived perfection. All the conversations are sexy and flirty and you connect over complaining about what “she” isn’t doing. Or what “he” isn’t doing. There’s no stomach viruses or bills or waiting up when a child is sick or a loved one dies. The woman on the side is like a vacation, you never see her with her hair wrapped and big panties on. You never see her bloated and cramping. She laughs when you call her at four am and tell her you were at the strip club or can’t sleep. So if that day comes when that side woman is given a promotion most men still expect that perfection, they expect that easy going, do what you want baby mindset. Once the woman realizes she’s in a no win situation; she can be that woman and get ran over or she can be who is wife was and get cheated on like she did. You keep them how you got them or you lose them how you got them.
One- Distrust- I can’t speak for all men but most of us have the same mindset despite our educational, economic or social backgrounds. If a woman will cheat with us she’ll cheat on us. If a woman will allow us to cheat with her, she should understand when we want to cheat on her. If a woman is willing to creep on her man with me, why wouldn’t she creep on me? These questions will plague us every time she’s coming home late or goes to visit her mother or goes on a vaca with her girls. Trust is as fragile as an infant’s touch. Once that trust is put in jeopardy the world will never be the same.