Why Is My Generation Producing So Many Weak Men?

dwhiteI remember sitting in the garage as a kid and listening to my grandfather and our next door neighbor talk about everything from their wives to work. Men have always talked to each other and has conversations, gossiped but it was usually with each other. One man to another, not six or seven guys in a group chat.

I’m not going to sit on this computer and be that guy that’s mocking men for wearing skinny jeans and sweat pants that look like they belong to a 12 year old girl running track. Maybe that’s the style now and it’s a generational thing but I am going to condemn men for no longer wanting to be men.

This isn’t about being gay or straight or transsexual. That’s not what I mean by not wanting to be a man. I simply mean, we have too many guys out here that take more pleasure in taking selfies or arguing online than they do taking out the trash.

I’m sure women get messaged on social media all the time but ask most women when is the last time a man walked over to them, introduced himself. Started a conversation and was interesting and funny and at the end of that encounter, asked for a phone number or a date? It rarely happens anymore, guys would rather argue online about why women suck than actually pursue them. Comment on pictures and get mad when they don’t get a response. It’s not okay and it’s getting worse.

My father’s generation of men dropped the ball. I know too many men and women in their late 20’s to early 40’s that have no relationship or screwed up relationships with their father’s. Men that don’t know what it means to be strong because they never saw it. I know too many guys that have moved from their mothers house to their woman’s house and the only difference is they respect their mom.

It doesn’t make you weak because you don’t make the money your woman makes or because you’re going through a hard time. It makes you weak when you aren’t trying and when you’re too proud to accept help and it’s at the expense of your relationships well being.

You ever been siting on the couch watching a game and your women comes out the room and asks, “How do I look?” She does a little spin and smiles and you give her that look like, “You aren’t wearing that out this house or if I’m not with you.” She knows it’s not coming from insecurity or being controlling. The respect she has for you and your opinion makes her go in that room and change, she respects your strength, even if she feels like the dress isn’t that short or tight. She’ll do it for your peace of mind. When you’re a weak guy, you can’t make those types of request. Asking her to change, to cook when she’s tired, to come home early because you miss her. You can do that when she knows you hold her down.

How the Last Great American President Lead to the Death of a Nation

President Obama and TrumpI thought if we just ignored Trump he would go away. Sort of like a summer cold. I don’t need to take any medicine because I’ll be okay in a day or two, it’s summer. Well my friends, it’s not summer anymore and we still have that cold. I thought writing about him, tweeting about him, Facebooking about him; those things would just give him more attention. He lives off attention. However, it’s almost a year later and he’s the Republican nominee for President. I think it’s time to stop ignoring him.

How do you destroy arguably the greatest Republic the world has ever known? You don’t have a once in a lifetime flood that puts the country under water. You don’t have a volcano that erupts and covers the country in lava. You don’t even have nuclear war that takes out millions of people and brings down skyscrapers and schools.

You destroy a country with a 4 step process. Racism, money and arrogance.

Racism

The number of hate groups in this country has grown by over 500% since the moment President Obama took office. We as a country ignored that racism still existed, of course we’d made progress since water hoses, dogs and separate water fountains but the culture and mentality never went away. The more popular President Obama became, the more resentment and hate started to build. So much so that by his second term you had United States Congressman and Senators openly saying they would veto everything and not work with him. There are certain counties in this country that have threatened to leave America because President Obama is our President. These people needed a voice. They needed someone that would feed into their hate and that voice became Donald Trump.

Money

Americans like wealth. We like the idea of someone building something and working for themselves. In Donald Trump a lot of Americans see a guy that came from nothing to something and is going to “Make America Great Again” by creating jobs. The problem with this logic is Donald Trump borrowed money from his father to start his first business. He had connections and was able to go bankrupt and just start over. But we live in a world of “Do as I say and not as I do.” So already tired of the Republicans they couldn’t relate to, they chose a man whose money they could relate to.

Arrogance

The Republican party thought they could play with fire and not get burnt. They thought they could walk the line of racism, sexism, inequality and there be no repercussions. They created a monster in the tea party and now they can’t control that monster. You have Senators and Congressman that are qualified to run this country and they can’t even get 2% of votes because the public sees them as empty suits. The sad thing is had they worked with President Obama and given him and his policies a chance. Trump would still be hosting TV shows instead of being 4 months away from the most important job on this earth.

There is a very simple and scary way Donald Trump can become President of the United States of America. Most Americans don’t vote. Hilary Clinton and Bernie Sanders both have supporters that will not vote for the other. So what happens if people that hate President Obama and simply vote Republican have a bigger turnout than those that don’t? I know people right now that think, “There’s no way Trump can win,” so I’m not voting. Have that mindset and America won’t be great again but will be at war again and again and again.

You’re Not Where You Want To Be In Life; Don’t Worry, Few Of Us Are

lies You’re Not Where You Want To Be In Life; Don’t Worry, Few Of Us Are

We’ve had beautiful weather almost this entire month. Gas is cheap enough where with a hundred dollars in your pocket you can be in Kemah or Austin for a Saturday of drinks and laughs and crawfish or BBQ. I haven’t had to cut my AC or Heater on in my home in like two weeks which means my bills won’t be harassing me. It’s been a good month so why are there so many miserable people? So many unhappy/ I’m looking for a fight sort of people. It’s because people have a hard time accepting that their version of happy and their story isn’t going to match someone else’s.

You know something I’ve never fully understood? It’s adults that work and live in the real world that make fun of other adults that spend income tax money. I want to scream, “YOU DO REALIZE INCOME TAXES COME FROM TAXES TAKEN OUT OF YOUR INCOME!” And furthermore it doesn’t mean you make too much money when you get no taxes back. Do you own a home, have children, donate to charity, have student loans, the list goes on. So this idea that “I don’t need my income tax money because I’m good” is crazy! I go to work everyday and every month they take taxes out of my check. Do they hesitate to take that money? Can I say, “Chill for a couple months Uncle Sam, I will pay you all my taxes in a couple months.” Yeah, I can’t.

In the mid to late 2000’s I would see people I went to high school with graduating from college and all I could think was, “I graduated higher than them. That person could barely read. They asked me for help with that exam.” I’d see men that cheated or weren’t responsible traveling with pretty women and getting married. Maybe back then I wouldn’t have admitted this but that made me so depressed. There were weeks where I didn’t even log onto Facebook because I couldn’t see that. Ten years later I see the error in my logic. Their happiness wasn’t a condemnation on my value or self-worth. Instead of being happy for them, I was a hater. It’s impossible for a hater to be happy. My journey is my journey, good or bad, win or lose.

I remember being at 300 before it was this new bowling alley and a woman that worked at a law firm invited me to her companies bowling outing. I was working picking up dead dogs, cleaning the sides of the roads, flagging cars at intersections. I didn’t meet them in my work clothes, I didn’t even throw on some jeans and a sweater. I put on a suit and walked in there like I’d just left a board meeting. Gas tank on E, maybe 5 dollars in my pocket. When someone asked me why I was drinking water all night, I told them, “It’s an early morning and I live far.” What I remember most about that night is taking a picture and posting it online and having all these people say things like, “I see you.” “Looking good.” “I want an invite.” I was putting on for some likes knowing I was hungry as hell and wanted to take them up on their offers of drinks and food. Pride and insecurity are horrible combinations. You never know what people that look like they have it all together are going through. Love your journey and your struggle.

Dating Tip: Romantic Dates Are More Mental Than Financial

Don’t be the guy making excuses when instead you can be making promises.

1. It cost too much. That’s literally not true; research is fast and easy.

2. Nice restaurants have slow nights, usually Monday- Wednesdays. Wine bottles 50% off. Extended happy hours. Waiters that are generous.

3. Order for her. Aggression, taking control is attractive. Ask her if she’s allergic to anything and then order. Don’t demand but ask without forcing. This way you know to order something good and you control the cost. I look up the menu and read reviews for every new restaurant I go to.

4. Always carry cash to tip well. Women may not always mention it but they notice the tip.

5. Laugh and smile without being silly.

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You’re A Great Woman But…

You’re a great woman but… you have no idea how to placate a man’s ego, I’m not saying be fake or let him believe he’s right when he’s not! I’m saying it doesn’t hurt to give a not so sincere compliment or to send a text explaining how great he is. We like to hear that, I can’t speak for most men but I’m pretty vain.

You’re a great woman but… you treat sex like it’s a weapon to be used at your disposal, you don’t send sexy text because that might leak on the internet if you break up. You don’t have sex when you’re mad because he’s on punishment, you don’t have sex when you’re tired, because… you’re tired. You don’t have sex before you go out because you might sweat out your hair. The thing about sex is this… It’s not that big a deal when it’s a healthy relationship, but once sex becomes an issue, it becomes like 90% of the problem. Basically a microcosm of what’s wrong with YOU! And I won’t even talk about oral tonight…

You’re a great woman but… you think you have the right to be comfortable. Old nightgowns on a Thursday night, big ugly socks on a summer’s night and don’t even get me started on panties… I hear this all the time, “everyone can’t wear thongs!” That’s perfectly fine, but don’t they make like a 100 different cuts and cute shapes that don’t fit like dental floss? Being comfortable in a relationship leads to trouble, it leads to coming home and wanting to lay down in the most relaxing outfit possible. And maybe that’s your two year old high school gym shirt… BUT THAT ISN’T SEXY!!! AND THAT IS GOING TO GET YOU PUT IN THE “My girlfriend is boring zone, let me see who’s on Facebook.”

You’re a great woman but… you have entirely too many male friends on Facebook. There is a big difference between a woman being cool with a man from work or with an old college friend and her being cool with 3000 random guys from across the USA and maybe overseas too! Every picture, every status, every link. They comment, some say crude things, some just flirt… and maybe you don’t oblige them, but you did add them. And you do keep adding them, so what is it? Do you just want the attention? Or are you advertising?

You’re a great woman but… YOU’RE BITTER AS HELL! All black men aren’t your ex or your child’s father or the guy you went out with for a week and he stalked you for a year. All guys aren’t the guy that never took you out or never paid for anything. All black guys don’t love white women and want you to cook for them 24/7 and all white guys won’t make you a Princess and put you in a Castle! Judge each man on his own merits, on how he treats you when he talks to you or when he see’s you. Is there a chance that he might change, switch it up… Of course there is, but love and relationships are about risk and carrying around that animosity and hate isn’t going to make the man want to work harder, it’s going to make him run!

You’re a great woman but… YOU’RE CHEAP AS HELL! Somewhere along the way you got it in your head that a man was supposed to pay for everything… From the dinners, to the desserts, to the drinks. And maybe you offer to pay here and there but you, I and the waitress or bartender knows it isn’t sincere. I’m a gentleman, I don’t mind picking up the check on a very regular basis but it’s all about give and take and it’s about being happy to do it. It’s one thing to do it because you know it’s necessary, it’s another to have the same enthusiasm you have when I pay… Just because you pay for one meal doesn’t mean I’m going to start asking you for money or leaving my wallet at home.

You’re a great woman but… You’re playing both sides of the fence, you want a good man, a guy that treats you right and goes to church and looks at you like you’re the only person in the world for him but you still text the asshole that couldn’t even get you RedBox and Popeyes. “He’s just my friend” or “I never call him, he’s calling me, I don’t want to be rude.” Why don’t you want to be rude exactly? You don’t owe him anything… Men are territorial, we accept certain friendships and we’ll even tolerate Social Networks but male associates that want to BANG you… that’s just not cool AND IT’S NOT SMART!

You’re a great woman but… Your friends make you look bad. We know they’re your girls from way back, we know they’ve had your back thru thick and thin but they’re slutty. And they have reputations and skanky pics online, it’s not so much that I care what people think. But perception is reality and “birds of a feather flock together.” So, when you get drama in your life and you wonder why men look at you this way or look at you that way, it’s because when they see you… They see your friends, so there’s no need to treat you like a potential wife or girlfriend.

You’re a good woman but… You have an image of a man that isn’t realistic… The average height for a male in the US is 5’ 9.2”, but you’re constantly talking about this 6’2 guy? So, you meet a great guy and he’s funny and smart but he isn’t tall enough or his stomach isn’t quite flat enough. You call it settling to give that man a chance so you don’t… Instead you stay home lonely and watch him marry your friend next year. You should be looking at him like a blank canvas, you can’t make him taller but you can feed him healthier foods and go to the gym or jogging with him. Quality time doesn’t have to be looking at a TV or going to a restaurant!

You’re a good woman but… You complain a lot… I MEAN A WHOLE LOT!!! It’s the first date; you have a problem with your job, your home, your ex, your family, your hair… just your life in general. You spend the entire night talking about how work drains you. This isn’t good conversation; this is you either pushing him away or you just not getting “it!” Complaining is one of those things that should be done in very little moderation. There’s a big difference between opening up and keeping it real and just venting for 2 hours…

Money Can’t Buy Love… But…

I’m sure there are plenty of women in this world that love broke men. Plenty of women that don’t care for nice things and love the idea of living pay check to paycheck as long as they’re in love.

The lights, water, gas and cable are all past due because he’s struggling but the love is real! I’m positive these women exist.

The only problem is they either get tired of this life or start making enough money to where him being broke doesn’t matter.

Money can’t buy love but money can buy loyalty and affection. Love doesn’t put gas in a car or buy brake pads.

But ‘money’ does. Because women love security. They love being able to have disposable income because you’re paying bills.

Women place a high value on their vagina, their mouth. They place expectations on you if you’re hitting it regularly. And when you’re beating it out the frame they’re sleeping with you because they WANT to but also because they trust you.

You can’t say I love you or I need you when you aren’t providing comfort. Its why women choose security over orgasms.

So money can’t buy love but its a damn good down payment and substitute.