What Do You Get For Having the Perfect Social Media Relationship… Nothing. Nothing At All

perfect-couple-2I love watching documentaries; I could literally sit up all night searching for the perfect one on Netflix. One of the things I love most about documentaries is that they’re true stories. These are real people that went through real things and we’re seeing it unfold through the eyes of their friends, family and co-workers. What I notice most about documentaries is that often times the people that seem the most perfect have the most secrets. By no means am I saying that that’s the same as couples that are perfect on social media but there is a correlation.

I saw a meme the other day that said, “It’s not fair that you share your entire relationship with us and then when you break up we don’t hear anything from you. That’s OUR RELATIONSHIP, we want to know what happened?” As funny as that may sound there’s actually some truth to that. Social media is a platform, you can build a business, build a brand, be a fan but more than anything you choose what you share. If you decide to share nothing but the good news and the romantic nights and the dope trips that’s your choice but understand something. If that’s not real, if you know in your heart that the image you’re projecting is simply for likes or to be in a competition with some woman you hated in high school. You’re doing yourself and your relationship a disservice.

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By no means am I saying that you should hop on social media and share hurtful and dark secrets about your relationship. What I am saying is that you should not get on social media and pretend. Putting a filter on a crappy relationship just so you can get notifications from Instagram is ignoring the problem. You don’t get any medals or gold stars for comments under a picture when you know the two of you barely talk at home.

Tomorrow someone could unplug the internet. We could wake up and our smart phones that we don’t go to the bathroom or eat lunch without could be as useless as iPhone chargers. The pictures you’ve posted about how great your relationship is vanished into Facebook and iCloud Heaven. Will the man or woman you’re in love with go to the ends of earth to find you? Are there pictures printed out on his desk of you?

You can remember how many likes the picture you posted of your date night got but can you remember the last time he smiled at you and you felt as though there were no doubts, no secrets, no hesitation. You get nothing for looking the part, playing the part. You get everything for seeing the flaws and working towards fixing them. You can pretend and have regrets or you can be honest and let people that may look to you and your relationship as an example know; we aren’t always perfect and sometimes I’m not even sure if we’re perfect for each other but we’re authentic and we never stop working towards where we want to be.

 

 

The Arrogance of A Man

dwhiteEven the smartest man can be a fool and not even know it.

Living life blind to the resentment, to the needs of those closest to his heart.

The arrogance of believing that Camelot won’t come crashing down.

The arrogance of believing that what was once pure cannot become tainted.

 

The best of intentions become clouded by the worst of judgements.

The most confident decisions become blinded by moments of insecurity and inadequacy gift wrapped in lies and deception.

The most memorable moments become soaked in insincerity.

The love becomes resentment.

 

Her own arrogance, her own ego, tell her what she needs to do. Tell her what she has to do. To not only win but to survive.

None of those are stronger than her heart. For heart betrays her and her resentment doesn’t push away love but embraces love and makes the hurt that much more painful.

“Do you know how many I have turned down?”

“Do you know how they look at me?”

“Do you know what you did to me?”

More questions than an SAT exam and not nearly enough answers.

More doubt than a tied football game in the closing seconds but there can be no winner.

 

Looking into her eyes, her tears tearing a hole in his soul, her anguish ripping at the fabric of his manhood.

Wanting to fix it all in one night, wanting to heal it all in one moment.

Needing to turn back the hands of time and give her the time she’d been cheated of. Give her the opportunities taken away from her like a thief in the night.

Wanting her to hate him so that she wouldn’t seem so perfect, even in her pain.

 

The arrogance of a man goes against forgiveness.

The love of a woman embraces it.

Knowing that a man could touch her or inhale her after him cuts like a sword through flesh and bone and hurts just as much.

Knowing that her love was no longer guaranteed.

His arrogance died.